Asthma

I hate it. I never had it as a kid, but instead, had my first asthma attack on the night that Nathan and I came home from the hospital after he was born. The doctor told me then that it was "trauma" induced due to the emergency cesarean and the stress of Nathan's being sick when he was born. And since I've moved back to Oklahoma, it has only gotten worse.

Spring and fall are my worst allergy seasons, therefore my worst asthma seasons. Whenever I have an attack, it feels as if I'm being stabbed multiple times in the back. If I move or try to breathe, it only gets worse. One of the worst attacks I ever had came a few years ago when I came down with bronchial pneumonia after my master's recital. It was the middle of the night and I felt like I was having a heart attack. It scared poor Steph nearly to death.

So far, this asthma season has been worse than I've had in a few years. I had an attack last week that kept me home from work. Today, I'm feeling very tenuous, like if I move too quickly, it's going to hit. There are little twinges and hints that it's there, as if there's an evil monkey on my back, poking and teasing, just letting me know he's there. The little jerk!